18 November 2010

Two months ago today ...

... Ewan made his entrance.


There was no time to be afraid. After seeing his face, there was no room for anything except hope.

And after all that has happened and even with how much our hearts ache and will continue to ache with this loss, I can still say I have no regrets. Given the choices of never knowing him and of knowing him and losing him, I would choose knowing him every time. I would choose loving him every time.

I miss you so much, beautiful boy.

16 comments:

Ams said...

Of course you would... look at that beautiful boy!!
What a blessing indeed :)
Thinking of you sweet lady!
xo

rockdog7711 said...

Sending thoughts, prayers and a hug to you! Thank you for sharing Ewan's story.

Theisen Trio said...

my heart is with you today as I think about sweet Ewan.

Nadine said...

I'm in tears reading this! My heart breaks for you friend! Beautiful boy!

The Emery's said...

Beautiful boy indeed...a gift sent straight from heaven......my heart breaks every day for you and your loss. The love you feel for him...it's so powerful and I'm so happy that you got to experience that kind of love...I'm just so sorry that you had to lose him. The loss is unimaginable to me. I love you and think of you so very often!

emily said...

He is beautiful! Lifting you up in prayer right now!

Tiffany said...

My instinct after I read each post is to hug you, cry with you and tell you how sorry I am that it didn't work out differently. Please know that you & your husband are always in my prayers.
Tiffany

Rebecca said...

Ewan's life was such a gift to all of us. Thank you for choosing life, Kirsten and James. I know there were many doctors and naysayers who would have urged you to abort. Praise God that you didn't! Ewan changed the world. His short but beautiful life brought such glory to God.

The pain is horrific, and I desperately wish that you still had him in your arms. I desperately wish that you were marking milestones and not a gravesite. But, even in the midst of these painful yearnings for it to be otherwise, I also thank God that that Ewan has a grave to mark. I am so glad that Ewan did not leave this world unloved.

Chrissie said...

Praying for you today x

terri said...

it feels like forever ago. it feels like yesterday. oh, this hurts.

love you.

tea said...

You are a wonderful mother, Kirsten. I'm so sorry you've had to go through what no mother should ever have to face. This is such a beautiful picture of Ewan.
Much love to you <3

not2brightGRAM said...

Ewan's life was such a powerful reminder that EVERY baby is precious, and EVERY life is valuable, no matter how short or painful. Only in eternity will you learn the impact his short life had on so many. My guess is that there are babies and children who are loved more intensely and cherished more highly. Dear one, you are loved.

Erin said...

You are in my thoughts and prayers daily. Even though I have never met you, I love you, and my heart goes out to you as I lay you gently before the Lord. ~Erin

christianne said...

I can hardly believe it has been two months. And I cannot imagine Ewan having not been in your life. The boy is an irreplaceable part of your story. I love that for you.

Nikki said...

I love reading that you have no regrets. It seems there are so many people in this world who question why a parent would bring this pain into their lives when there is an alternative.

I'm like you. I'd rather know and see my beautiful and perfect child, even if only for a few weeks, days or even moments, than to spend the rest of my life wondering about him/her and wondering if I made the right decision.

As parents, it's our responsibility to do everything in our power to give our child a body. Even if their calling on earth is complete right after they get here, it's up to us to give them a body (if we are able) so they can have a body to be resurrected to.

I love little Ewan so much. I pray for you guys. I think of you guys. I love you guys.

felmleyfam said...

oh your words are so perfect.... "given the choices...."
praying