Kirsten and I (circa 1984) |
Kirsten and I (circa 2011) |
We all had dreams when we were younger. We would dream of growing up into someone of
substance, like a doctor or a firefighter. We would fantasize of becoming famous through our impressive dance moves or our melodic talent. Or we simple dream of getting married and raising a family. Now that we are older and some of those dreams seem silly or unattainable now, we hold fast to what was, what could be, and what is yet to come.
We lose hold of those dreams, barely believing they existed. They seem to only exist in a world of imagination. Or we put them into practice everyday we wake. I was never a child that had lofty dreams of being anything specific. I had ideas of what I imagined my life would be like, assuming things like marriage, career, and a family would be possible. I went to college almost to fulfill the expectation that this is what you do post K-12 education, it was expected. Never believing that I wouldn't fulfill my unspecified dreams by the time I graduated. Cap and gown came and went. College diploma in hand. I awoke to find nothing different, nothing changed. I still search for my dreams.
Now Kirsten on the other hand was a girl who would not be ignored or unnoticed, no matter what she did. She colored the walls with crayons, she taught herself to read, never lacking in her tenaciousness for anything that she did. Never knowing what she was to say or do next. Sound familiar? Always an overachiever, perfect was never perfect enough. I mean just ask her about her A- grade in physical education that kept her from a perfect grade point average and you could begin to see what I know about my sister.
She strives for perfection in every aspect of her life. From her writing to her photography to preparing her home for this new life. It keeps her striving to be better every day. Man alive, I wish I had an ounce of that passion some days. Most days I shrug and think, good enough. Now she strives for something different, some call it a higher calling. She strives to be a good mother.
You all know the story, otherwise you wouldn't be reading this now would you? You gathered in prayer when death became more powerful than life. You didn't sleep when surgeons held a tiny heart in their hands. You cried tears over an empty nursery, only wishing you could do more. And now you wait as a new life is about to come to be. You wait patiently and anxiously of word of new beginnings And so Kirsten strives for perfection in these moments. So don't be discouraged if you don't see a post in Team Ewan or a status update for a while, moments like these are precious and to be protected.
So I take it upon myself as Auntie Kaari to protect these dreams of Kirsten and James as they were my own. Be comforted in the fact that they appreciate all those words of encouragement, wonderful prayers, and your continual support as you wait to hear word of Austen's arrival. And when the time is perfect and their dreams are finally soaking in as reality, then you will made known to a dream finally realized.