I have gotten some pretty insane comments over the course of this pregnancy (read about one extended and awkward exchange here): about my belly size, about my ankles, about my diet, about being pregnant in the summer ... you name it. I've been asked if this pregnancy was planned (and advised to plan "better" next time so as not to be pregnant through the summer), if I'm having twins, if I'm sure of the due date, and so on. It gave me inspiration to write a list about things not to say/do to a pregnant woman, but I figured someone had already written such a list.
I was right: such a list has already been written. It's hilarious and true. There are 10 items on that list, and 7 of them have been said/done to me. I figure that I've got 10 weeks left and I'll just give the other three time. I'd love to know what it is (psychologically and sociologically speaking) that makes people who would never otherwise make commentary to a woman's face about her enormous size (or the state of her ankles, whether or not her condition was "planned", or opinions on what she is eating), comment freely and at length about such things.
Can you imagine if I were to go up to an overweight person in a restaurant (or anywhere in public for that matter) and talk to them about how big they are and how they shouldn't be eating what they're eating? I would expect to be slapped or at the very least, kicked out.
In any case, whether or not it's right I know I can't stop people from saying stupid things to me. We've been trying to come up with a direct and truthful response to these kinds of comments that is not mean-spirited. James suggested the following, and I think I'll use it when I'm next in a situation where someone makes a comment and I don't know what else to say:
The most uncomfortable part of this pregnancy for me is all the unsolicited commentary I'm getting when out in public.
It's not rude. It's not retalitatory. It's not mean-spirited. And it's true.